Tuesday, February 03, 2009

The Funny Thing

I told Jed that for Valentines this year, instead of getting each other gifts, we could just do nice things for each other. (Ohhhhhh cuuuuute!!!) My first plan--vacuum the car. Jed loves a clean car, and unfortunately (you remember my cupboard), with kids' wet snow boots kicking the backs of the seats, cracker crumbs and formula splashes, it was in total disarray.

I headed for the nearest car wash with a pocketful of change. I threw away all sorts of treasures, and, shoving the children aside, was ready to vacuum. I was doing relatively well--you have to go fast, you know, or you run out of time. (Are you thinking about me vacuuming really fast? Do. It's kind of funny.) The beeping indicating one minute left came on, I gave it a couple more quarters and finished the job.

I was so pleased! Check me out with my three kids and a clean car! I'm so awesome, I decide to continue on. It's a nice day, so it would be a shame to not use my obvious car cleaning talent (who knew!) on the outside as well.

I'm not a car wash regular, as you might have gathered from the start. I usually either get lucky and come in to free car wash coupons that my dad can't use, but obsessively gathers, or we wash it at home with soap and water. But today, you betcha, I am going to use that foaming brush. $1.50? No problem! Now ready, set, go!

I'm rinsing--hurry, hurry! Switch the knob...foaming brush. Oh, foaming brush! Who knew you could be so charming! What with your pink smelly soap and...wait, what is that beeping? Not one minute left! No, I couldn't be!

No big deal, here's another dime and a nickel and a dime. plink, plink, plink...to coin return. Quarters only?! What's wrong with dimes? They're silver too!
Oh dear. Switch the knob...high pressure rinse. And 5,4,3,2,1. Trickle...trickle.......tri...ck.......l...e.

Pulling out of the stall...
"Mom, why are we leaving? The car still has soap on it."
"Look there are bubbles on it mom."
"Yes, kids I know."
"Mom, you have to rinse the bubbles off."
"You need to use more water mommy."
"Yes, but Mommy ran out of money and the water stopped."

(Two guys in a truck watch me pull out of the car wash parking lot. They do a double take.)

"How are you going to get the bubbles off?"
Hmmm...hose turned off for winter. "Yeah, we're just going to go home and figure it out."

A few seconds later waiting at what seems to be a really long traffic light.
"What's so funny mom?"
"Oh, just that we're driving home with pink soap all over our car."

And so went my first Valentines surprise for Jed. Maybe I should have stuck with a gift.


Katy said...

Aaaah. Gifts from the heart!

Lisa said...



Lindsey said...

That.is.hysterical. And you know if I saw a car driving by with pink bubbles and 3 kids in the car I would be dying laughing. Oh, Jaynie - I love you.

I also love the story of "Deacon starts with Deke"! That made me so happy that Parley was thinking of Deacon!

Shana said...

Did you vacuum up some fries? I was always vacuuming up fries. Remember when Mike brought home a new car and we went for a ride and Mitchell was coughing and coughing and almost threw up and everyone had snowy feet and the next day Mike took back the new car and a while later brought home a nice, rebuilt, used car?

jed said...

love me those rebuilt used cars. but i do like them clean. thanks, dear, for the thoughtful gift.

Camille Hill said...

Pink soap for Valentine's Day - how appropriate! I'm sure he loved it.

megan said...

Maybe one of Jed's nice deeds could be a nice roll of quarters left in your glovebox--they might come in handy!

Washer Mom Val said...

Cute post - "it's the thought that counts" - I'd play that card! What does pink soap dry like?

Teachinfourth said...

Haven't we all been there before...run out of quarters and then the panic-driven rinse cycle?

It could have been worse...

Actually, never mind...that was pretty bad.

Anonymous said...

oh my stomach muscles hurt. You should not do this to me! I can see it now!


ali said...

i know what you were thinking. pink suds for valentines day!

jay said...

you are so great jayne i am suppressing my giggling because the kids are sleeping and my husband is still working on the basement and i'm supposed to be either helping him or sleeping. i could picture it all. i can't stop laughing

Anonymous said...

you are so great jayne i am suppressing my giggling because the kids are sleeping and my husband is still working on the basement and i'm supposed to be either helping him or sleeping. i could picture it all. i can't stop laughing

jay said...


Anonymous said...

Jayne, I just read "A Funny Thing" and it made me laugh out loud. You are so talented. I wish you would send that one to the Herald and tell them you would like to do a weekly column...with that as your by-line. All about life as a young mother. You could have fun and earn a little money as well. You are so much fun. I love you more than tongue can tell.

Juli said...

Ok, that is the funniest thing I have ever heard. I bet you were a sight driving home!

Beckmandusi said...
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