Monday, February 08, 2010

Well Begun is Half Done

I found this in one of Hazel's many notebooks the other day. It is great for so many reasons. Firstly, I am wondering where this money is that we're getting. I feel like most of us are not pulling our weight in that department. But the funniest part about this short essay, is that she thinks we work hard together. We do NOT work hard together. In fact, this very weekend I swore that if Jed did not take over the supervision of children working I'd give up forever.

It actually started well. Usually their jobs consist of picking up toys and cleaning windows (which always turns into an awesome waste of Windex). I decided to switch the jobs up a little bit, because I couldn't fight my usual 45 minute fight with Parley on how putting cars into a box is actually not hard. So, like my mother in days gone by, I filled up a bowl with soapy water, and showed them the food stained wall and greasy finger-printed cupboards to wash off. The soapy water was intriguing, and Hazel actually declared, "Oh, Parley! I love this job! I did it at Grandma Clark's on the chairs!" Parley always claims the same attitude as Hazel, so things were off to a good start. I wish I would have started a timer, because it wasn't a full minute later that Hazel was crying about how hard her job was.

Me: "Hazel, you just told me you love this job."
Hazel: "I actually do love this job, but cupboards are just SO hard!"
Me: "Really? Is it that hard to wipe off that cupboard door?"
Hazel: crying, grunting, dramatically wiping.

Julian wandered around dunking the drying towels into the soapy water and dripping them across my newly-mopped floor. While Parley, clearly oblivious to Hazels dramatics (or he would have known it was time to change his tune) actually wiped the wall without complaint.
I eventually moved Hazel over to the wall with Parley and tackled those terribly hard cupboards alone. While she wiped the wall she continued to cry, "Mom! The cupboards are just SO hard!"

Let me assert once again: we do not work hard together.
Although they do a fine job, as she mentions, at getting food. And then wiping it on the walls and cupboards.


Katie said...

Oh this sounds so familiar. I could unload the dishes 13 times in the time it takes my boys.

"But it takes SOOO long!"
" it doesn't take long if you just start putting it away. See watch I just put five away in the last ten seconds"
"But I want you to help me!"
"I just did help you I've already done more than half of them"
"But I just want to go to Jaynie's"
"then get started. The sooner you start the sooner you will finish. Remember how if we just get started and work on it- it gets done quickly? And if we complain it takes forever? Get started."
"Will you please do some more?"

By this time we could have been unloaded, loaded and over to Jaynie's house.

Sarah Burgoyne said...

You are not alone Jayne you are not alone. Isn't it times like these when you feel like calling your mom and apologizing?

megan said...

Hey look--Katie isn't anon anymore!

First of all, why is it that putting toys into a bin seems so hard to kids? They sure don't think it's hard to dump out. I think mine do better if they have help, no matter what the task, but like in your case, that usually means they just BEGIN to help and the I do all the jobs. I don't think it's really worth all the arguing so I usually don't mind that either.

But you are a "good family" no matter how hard those darn cupboards are to wash.

Sue said...

I was laughing out loud on this one. Thanks!


Shana said...

I just whined and dramatically wiped up my kitchen floor (yes, I really did just wipe it up, not sweep it) and declared, "I hate my house." I know exactly how they feel.

Megan said...

Last night I had to stop myself from screaming in Maggie's face "IT'S NOT HARD TO THROW ALL OF YOUR STINKING TOYS INTO ONE BUCKET." I don't even make her sort them anymore. Barbie's, hotwheels, puzzle pieces. I've given up. I just want them in one flipping place. But she will pick up a barbie shoe and hit it against the side of the bucket saying over and over "I too little. It won't go it. I just too little."

Oh my word. Your blog makes me feel so much better.

Jen said...

Ahh... to see the world through a childs eyes!

Carrie Hellewell said...

This was music to my ears. It's good to know that mine is not the only daughter who has her dramatics down to a science. Just this afternoon she was crying about picking up a few hair ribbons. I find it amazing at how quickly those tears can emerge. Although, my nickname as a young girl was "water works" so I guess I should be more understanding...but I'm not.

Kim said...

See Jayne, this is where my dreams of a maid come to reality. Scrubbing walls and cabinets is SO hard that I would rather pay someone else to do it. Too bad my husband does not agree.

ali said...

cleaning is such a drag. i'm with hazel. grunts and all!

k a t y said...

You are a good family.

Lindsay said...

I love you so much! you are the best!

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